[Chilton's head whipped in mirroring motion, taking the slap hard. He froze, his eyes wide, able to feel the reddish imprint of her strike across his cheek.]
Matthew. [Hissed Chilton, his face still glacial in position.] Has no idea I spoke with Lucifer. He has no idea that his own protection hinges upon your own. You enraged him, Raina, when you oozed before Crane -- I had to do something.
I've profiled the demon. He is nothing if not vindictive, for all his smiles and winks, he would have gutted you the first chance. I know this kind of evil.
[ The anger -- that ire of flames extinguished suddenly. But it wasn't the soothing cool of water that put them out. Raina's expression became one of abject disappointment mingled with devastated disbelief. ]
You're underestimating me.
[ She shook her head, turning away from him and closing off into herself as she sank down onto her office chair -- her legs seemed a little too shaky to support standing. All of this time, Chilton had boasted they were equals and yet, rather than turning to her about his meeting with Lucifer or trusting her to take care of herself, he was taking matters into his own hands -- deciding without her to gamble with devils for her safety, putting faith in the fallen and faithless when he should have been putting faith in her. ]
What a number Matthew Lin has done on you for you to elevate him so high onto a pedestal. You're glorifying him, worshiping his abilities to kill and how dangerous he is. You would even go as far as to become no better than Lucifer's dog -- answering when he beckons, rolling over in submission, and letting him own you -- than to think I can handle myself against Lin. Where is the glorious man I fell in love with? The man who would never submit and could rule the world with his cunning mind and silver tongue? The man who believed in me? Has Matthew really stolen you away from me this much?
Here. I'm right here! [Aggravated gesturing brought two fingers to indicate his own set of eyes -- his body, electric and emotional, hummed in motion.] I am here, the same man, and without master. Don't you dare conflate your own insecurity over that demon with any concern of my own independence!
[Stolen you away from me. It rang in his ears.]
This is an opportunity, Raina. I'm not going to sign in blood.
[ She looked up at him sharply. The remark about her insecurity lanced through her, reminded her of how he weakened her and she hated it. But then he tried to insist upon being his own master, emphasizing his independence. What independence? He wanted to sign a contract with Lucifer. And Lucifer's terms were compliance. What independence would that give him?
Nothing about this was making any sort of sense. Which must have meant there were parts he wasn't telling her. ]
You better not sign at all. It's unnecessary and too much of a risk.
Too much of a risk for whom? [Chilton's shoulders tightened; it was made clear in his body language that he wanted to touch her, that he wanted to press into her so she might understand him, but he refrained. A slap was answer enough.]
You're worried about losing me, is that it? Or do you deem Lucifer a rival in pure possession?
[Another pointed question.]
I assure you, Raina. It isn't me he's interested in. He wants to soothe his own ego, he wants my defiance against him to still. Then he will forget all about me, and you and I only stand to benefit from the bargain.
I can't even believe you need to ask me that question. Those questions. Of course I don't want to lose you -- of course I don't want anyone to have any piece of you that should belong to me. But the risk is to you. It puts you much too close to them. And it puts you in his debt which is the most dangerous place you can be with that type of creature. Why do you think you can outwit the devil when it comes to deals? Why are you even entertaining the thought? And why are you so insistent that he will lose interest and go on his merry way?
He won't. You are a prize to be had. And if that wasn't obvious by the way the demons are encircling you like snakes in the grass, then perhaps consider how you are being primed to become Crane's replacement.
Because I've outwitted him before. Because I have since learned from Hannibal Lecter. [The true demoralizing pinnacle, at least according to Chilton. Lucifer, slick and preening, was at least far more honest than Lecter had ever been. Humanity was a greater evil.] And that devil has already made it clear that while he cares for neither Crane nor myself, he values Crane's cruelty more than what I'm willing to do for him. He mistakes my motives, Raina, plain and simple -- I'm not playing with a cannibalistic psychiatrist here.
[At her mention of demons, Chilton shrugged away the wording.]
As long as Will Graham exists in this universe, he will always be prime bait for such creatures. He's the canary, and I watch his movements. Given Will's empathetic capabilities, our favorite archangel would do better to use him if he's considering Crane's inevitable downfall.
[And Chilton knew that Lucifer was considering it, as Lucifer had alluded to that outcome during their chat.]
[ It seemed as though Raina wasn't the only one Chilton was underestimating. And it was frustrating. This was a fatal mistake, and Chilton -- all pride and ego couldn't seem to be persuaded off the path. The temptation had lured him, drawn as he was to the promise of the apple -- lured by Raina unintentionally and ensnared by the slippery serpents. ]
It's a terrible idea. If you didn't know that deep down inside, you would have told me about it before you met with him. It's clear to me that you've come up with arguments and justifications for this decision and nothing I can say will dissuade you from making your mistake.
But if you're so keen to make your deals -- then leave me out of them. I neither want nor require Lucifer's protection. I am not going to have any part in this -- even if my only part would be to reap the benefits.
Raina -- what do you want from me? [It was exasperated, gnawing, a tone edging towards disaster.] I've taken pains to keep you involved. I'm sure there are plenty of unsavory individuals you involve yourself with. People I wouldn't personally engaged. And yet I wouldn't judge you.
You of all people know that sometimes we need to take risks to triumph. Sometimes we need to commit unpalatable deals.
[He walked around her, giving her a respectable distance.]
[ Raina swiveled in her chair to face him, her eyes intense and burning into him. ]
You have every power inside of you to triumph. You don't need them. And don't you dare compare this to anything I have done, Frederick. I'm not the one signing mystical contracts. I am not the one getting in over their head.
[Chilton maintained his stance, parallel to her while beside the desk, his legs planted firmly apart. He met her eyes.]
This isn't protecting me, Raina. What you're doing, it's little but coddling me. Such is merely a self-soothing technique -- you want to feel in control of me, of my actions. You don't trust me.
Do what you want, Doctor Chilton. Forgive me for thinking this conversation was anything but one-sided. Forgive me for stating my opinions and trying to talk sense into you. Go right ahead and do as you will. Next time, I'll try and hold back my concerns for your well being as well as your very soul.
My soul is not in the contract, Raina. [Chilton still didn't know her last name, so he couldn't resort to that.] You seemed to have no similar concerns when you accepted that damned Famine ring from the devil himself.
[Oh yeah, bringing that whole Horseman thing back up. Chilton knows he was the only one forced into the conflict.]
That is not the same thing. There were no deals. It was an offering and an agreement and never once did I ask for anything in return from him. Never once was I the one to approach him and barter for something.
And while we're on the subject, how about those rings, hm? How about all your trepidation and anger about being used? And then all of a sudden, you turn around and do this?
None of it makes ANY sense to me whatsoever. Surely I am not your only motivation for this deal otherwise you wouldn't be putting up such a violent argument when I expressed my disapproval.
[ That was what she gleaned from his hesitation. Actually, it was what she gleaned from this whole thing when Chilton refused to back down. Raina furrowed her brows. ]
[ She didn't like hearing that. Chilton having problems. Because his patients tended to be......criminally insane. His patients tended to cut him open and harvest his organs. ]
Oh my god, Frederick.
[ Her anger gave way to concern. ]
What happened? And when were you going to mention this to me?
It's been an ongoing venture, Raina. This one, he's a premium mind. Volatile, amenable. Perfect -- you of all people can appreciate the perfect test subject. I want him to make my name here.
[Chilton was always chasing those illustrious academic circles.]
But we have since... Had a series of issues. [Chilton looked away, confronted with the possibility of distasteful failure.] I might have pushed him to a breaking point too quickly.
I just wanted the insurance. [He accepted her movement, her hands and his.] I wanted the influence. This might -- this could be where I must excel, in this world. While apparently Hannibal doesn't kill me...
[He looked at her, his mouth a soft frown.]
No one has been able, or willing, to tell me the outcome. What's worse than death, Raina? Or do even they not know?
[ Her brows stitched, lips parted in open mouthed surprise. And then she looked down at his hands in her own. ]
Being indebted. Owing someone something. Losing your defiance. Being forced to move when called.
[ Her thumbs traveled over his knuckles, soft and delicately. ]
I would say those things are worse than death. No matter what you face back home, no matter what comes of you -- I have no doubt in your ability to claw your way out of it and come out on top. You are nothing if not strong and unbreakable. You held your own internal organs in your hand, and you survived. No one who goes up against you will win. And you don't need anyone else to do that -- not even me. Because that is your nature. That is your strength. That is why I chose you because I saw this in you from our very first meeting, your ruthless, cunning strength.
Have you made many deals with your own devils? [It was a pointed questioned asked without judgment; he was curious. He was vulnerable.] I hadn't, outside of the devil, and that alone hadn't rescued me from dire consequence. Abel Gideon tortured me in Baltimore, as well as here. Crane attacked me in my own secondary office. I've been subjected to... Surveillance that served only to flatter a compulsive controller. I've been tormented and threatened countless times.
[He brought her hands close to his chest, pressing them against his heart.]
Insurance. A Plan B. An ace up my sleeve -- it's not an invitation to get complacent. This removes some inhibition. We can do so much more.
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Matthew. [Hissed Chilton, his face still glacial in position.] Has no idea I spoke with Lucifer. He has no idea that his own protection hinges upon your own. You enraged him, Raina, when you oozed before Crane -- I had to do something.
I've profiled the demon. He is nothing if not vindictive, for all his smiles and winks, he would have gutted you the first chance. I know this kind of evil.
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You're underestimating me.
[ She shook her head, turning away from him and closing off into herself as she sank down onto her office chair -- her legs seemed a little too shaky to support standing. All of this time, Chilton had boasted they were equals and yet, rather than turning to her about his meeting with Lucifer or trusting her to take care of herself, he was taking matters into his own hands -- deciding without her to gamble with devils for her safety, putting faith in the fallen and faithless when he should have been putting faith in her. ]
What a number Matthew Lin has done on you for you to elevate him so high onto a pedestal. You're glorifying him, worshiping his abilities to kill and how dangerous he is. You would even go as far as to become no better than Lucifer's dog -- answering when he beckons, rolling over in submission, and letting him own you -- than to think I can handle myself against Lin. Where is the glorious man I fell in love with? The man who would never submit and could rule the world with his cunning mind and silver tongue? The man who believed in me? Has Matthew really stolen you away from me this much?
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[Stolen you away from me. It rang in his ears.]
This is an opportunity, Raina. I'm not going to sign in blood.
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Nothing about this was making any sort of sense. Which must have meant there were parts he wasn't telling her. ]
You better not sign at all. It's unnecessary and too much of a risk.
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You're worried about losing me, is that it? Or do you deem Lucifer a rival in pure possession?
[Another pointed question.]
I assure you, Raina. It isn't me he's interested in. He wants to soothe his own ego, he wants my defiance against him to still. Then he will forget all about me, and you and I only stand to benefit from the bargain.
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[ Raina held up her hands, shaking her head. ]
I can't even believe you need to ask me that question. Those questions. Of course I don't want to lose you -- of course I don't want anyone to have any piece of you that should belong to me. But the risk is to you. It puts you much too close to them. And it puts you in his debt which is the most dangerous place you can be with that type of creature. Why do you think you can outwit the devil when it comes to deals? Why are you even entertaining the thought? And why are you so insistent that he will lose interest and go on his merry way?
He won't. You are a prize to be had. And if that wasn't obvious by the way the demons are encircling you like snakes in the grass, then perhaps consider how you are being primed to become Crane's replacement.
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[At her mention of demons, Chilton shrugged away the wording.]
As long as Will Graham exists in this universe, he will always be prime bait for such creatures. He's the canary, and I watch his movements. Given Will's empathetic capabilities, our favorite archangel would do better to use him if he's considering Crane's inevitable downfall.
[And Chilton knew that Lucifer was considering it, as Lucifer had alluded to that outcome during their chat.]
I'm a prize only for you, Raina.
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It's a terrible idea. If you didn't know that deep down inside, you would have told me about it before you met with him. It's clear to me that you've come up with arguments and justifications for this decision and nothing I can say will dissuade you from making your mistake.
But if you're so keen to make your deals -- then leave me out of them. I neither want nor require Lucifer's protection. I am not going to have any part in this -- even if my only part would be to reap the benefits.
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You of all people know that sometimes we need to take risks to triumph. Sometimes we need to commit unpalatable deals.
[He walked around her, giving her a respectable distance.]
I want, Raina. I want and I hunger for.
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[ Raina swiveled in her chair to face him, her eyes intense and burning into him. ]
You have every power inside of you to triumph. You don't need them. And don't you dare compare this to anything I have done, Frederick. I'm not the one signing mystical contracts. I am not the one getting in over their head.
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[Chilton maintained his stance, parallel to her while beside the desk, his legs planted firmly apart. He met her eyes.]
This isn't protecting me, Raina. What you're doing, it's little but coddling me. Such is merely a self-soothing technique -- you want to feel in control of me, of my actions. You don't trust me.
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[Oh yeah, bringing that whole Horseman thing back up. Chilton knows he was the only one forced into the conflict.]
So don't get sanctimonious with me.
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And while we're on the subject, how about those rings, hm? How about all your trepidation and anger about being used? And then all of a sudden, you turn around and do this?
None of it makes ANY sense to me whatsoever. Surely I am not your only motivation for this deal otherwise you wouldn't be putting up such a violent argument when I expressed my disapproval.
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[He was gesturing again, his fingers splaying from his upward flying palms.]
That is our philosophical difference. That is where we cease to make sense to each other. You take to give, and I give to take.
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[A beat.]
Once. I find myself in a compromised position.
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[ That was what she gleaned from his hesitation. Actually, it was what she gleaned from this whole thing when Chilton refused to back down. Raina furrowed her brows. ]
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[A quiet surrender.]
I've asked for other things. Personal things. I have a... Problem. With a patient.
A problem patient.
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Oh my god, Frederick.
[ Her anger gave way to concern. ]
What happened? And when were you going to mention this to me?
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[Chilton was always chasing those illustrious academic circles.]
But we have since... Had a series of issues. [Chilton looked away, confronted with the possibility of distasteful failure.] I might have pushed him to a breaking point too quickly.
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[ Raina scooted the chair to close their distance, gently reaching out to take his hands. It was okay. For now. To touch. ]
Frederick, you are the most incredible person I know. What you're capable of, what you can accomplish -- no one can match your mind.
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[He looked at her, his mouth a soft frown.]
No one has been able, or willing, to tell me the outcome. What's worse than death, Raina? Or do even they not know?
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Being indebted. Owing someone something. Losing your defiance. Being forced to move when called.
[ Her thumbs traveled over his knuckles, soft and delicately. ]
I would say those things are worse than death. No matter what you face back home, no matter what comes of you -- I have no doubt in your ability to claw your way out of it and come out on top. You are nothing if not strong and unbreakable. You held your own internal organs in your hand, and you survived. No one who goes up against you will win. And you don't need anyone else to do that -- not even me. Because that is your nature. That is your strength. That is why I chose you because I saw this in you from our very first meeting, your ruthless, cunning strength.
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[He brought her hands close to his chest, pressing them against his heart.]
Insurance. A Plan B. An ace up my sleeve -- it's not an invitation to get complacent. This removes some inhibition. We can do so much more.
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